Searching for Respect

After an even more rotten day today that yesterday (so much for that optimistic interpretation of “Zewhyxary.” I’ll never make that mistake again) I searched for a theme which connected my feature poem of today to my poem for today, and have decided it’s all about out intense need for respect as human beings.

I was introduced to Wendy Cope in my poetry class, and I like her because, quite simply, she’s funny. The particular poem we studied was “Lonely Hearts,” a villanelle of personal ads. And it’s funny. And it’s also about a bunch of ordinary people looking for a little more respect and a little more happiness. I guess it goes to show that you can interpret a poem just about any way, as long as you’re in the mood for it. Sometimes you even find the secret of life hiding away in them, even though you can’t find it again later. It’s the very subjectivity of poetry which makes me like it so much.

My poem (which might be more of a rant) is inspired by my bad day, and could be interpreted to go along with today’s prompt to say things to someone you wouldn’t actually say. I won’t tell you who exactly I’m speaking to, however.

Contrary to popular belief,
I am NOT a robot.
I understand that
due to the recently released line of
VERY REALISTIC® robots,
I somewhat resemble the
VERY REALISTIC PRO BOT® 2.2.
It’s okay.
Lots of people have made the mistake.
But there are a few simple ways to tell
the difference between a
VERY REALISTIC PRO BOT® 2.2
and a human being, like myself.
First of all, a robot does not require
sleep, food, or affection.
If you would like your
VERY REALISTIC PRO BOT® 2.2
to be ENTHUSIASTIC all the time, all
you need do is turn
the dial in the back. If your
VERY REALISTIC PRO BOT® 2.2
fails to be ENTHUSIASTIC
all the time, this could be a glitch
in the programming.
First, check to see that the dial is turned
to the proper setting. If it is
check the batteries. It is possible your
VERY REALISTIC PRO BOT® 2.2
needs to be recharged. If not,
call the maintenance number on the back of your
VERY REALISTIC PRO BOT® 2.2
underneath the dial.
An operator will be with you shortly.
I, however, do not have a maintenance number
on my back. And
if I am not ENTHUSIASTIC
all the time, it is not
a glitch in my programing, but a lack
of sleep, food, or affection.
Unlike myself, a robot has no need
for respect. But if you respect
me, I not only function better, I offer
respect in return.
Third, the maintenance cost for the
VERY REALISTIC PRO BOT® 2.2
is significantly lower than that of a human.
This may explain the difference between
the amount of money I have received and
the amount of money I should have received.
But given the appropriate treatment,
the delicate human is more effective than the
VERY REALISTIC PRO BOT® 2.2.
Unlike a robot, I understand
the delicate constitutions of other humans. I know
how to handle miscommunication. I offer
sleep, food, and affection to others. I predict
potential problems before they occur. I meet
the needs of others. And most importantly, I think
No, I’m not implying you’re a robot.
I’m implying you’re a soulless demon.

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